That was on Friday. Im so interested in him so Im conflicted. But Im not certain its not because he now wants to hurry to get the house finished and sell it while the market is hot. I am literally in the exact same position. Theres a reason why the Geneva Convention bans sleep deprivation as torture What you need to do is make time to get a little bit of rest (and youll actually find that you will become more productive with a little rest too and not have to spend so much time lacking sleep). Anyway not sure what to do either but it helps to know Im not the only one. He replied: about what? At this point we fight so much and afterwards Im always the one to try to settle things because he just cant comprehend what he said really hurts. Find the courage to leave him! Just about two weeks ago, the cycle broke. Now i think ill do my best to be nice to him for some time and if he doesnt change i leave him.. Is it ok for wait and see for his cahnge? Im the beginning, it was easy. I asked if he still has resentment but he said he doesnt. I gave him the benefit of the doubt too many times. When I got back from fall breakEverything changed../me him and his sister made a plan for when i graduated, i was gonna move in with him and his sister and go to college around there but that changed to him getting an apartment and a moped and me moving in with him and going to college. I feel like Im the only one putting any effort for us to spend time together. My boyfriend had a terrible marriage and an even worse divorce. I have to fix myself and thats the problem with people now adays. Im so embarassed and devastated plus the sex he didnt touch me but he kiss me but I understand because I only give him minutes. Ask your boyfriend open-ended questions about how he thinks your relationship is going, and if theres anything you both can do to bring you closer together. Now we seem so disconnected. Then make him work for you! I am often not successful but I realized in the last 1-2 years, it is him. Why doesnt he ever randomly surprise me, try to plan out dates, put a lot of thought into gifts, etc. His family are complicated, we rushed into our relationship, live together almost 5 years. It is always me who looks up special events to go to like Gamevention (cause he likes video games), new Indian restaurants (cause he likes spicy food), or initiates going for a walk. Because honestly when I do he always comes back around. I met my boyfriend at work. In all reality if he is losing interest youll know in time. We are in LDR. Hes really bad at texting and sometimes we dont really talk on the phone cause he said he was tired. And im an amazing girlfriend. I was in a similar situation when I was in college. Youre boyfriend seems like a catfish. His daughter really likes me. Is he back with me to punish me or hes still holding back because of the break up and I just need to wait? she tells him SHE is sorry. I did confront him regarding that and he said he still feels the same.But his recent actions have been bugging me and I cant help but feel like hes ignoring me on purpose,like hes tired of me. No updates or goodnight/ goodmorning texts.The thing is, I get worried easily.I didnt wanna bother him cause I knew he could get pretty busy with chores at home and his fam is kinda strict on exposure to electrical gadgets so he doesnt want to be on his phone much when hes with them. He is highly smart so I am not going to spell it out for him. I love him more than ever and I know I made the biggest mistake of my life. The way he acted after you said you need a romantic date, even if you said it while in tears or upset, is absolutely unacceptable. And i couldnt forget it. He used to do things for me but it seems like he doesnt do anything. Help me please I have no idea what to do. What would you do? He told me about his insecurity that I seem to have a plan and moving forward with my life and career, while hes not and he fears the future ahead. Often the dog doesnt get walked for a few hours in the morning because I have to get myself and the kids ready before I can take the dog out when really he could just get up and do it.He never wants to come on walks with us. Sometimes he will notice mistakes I make on the work but not notice how much I need his affection. Any advice please? Three weeks in he moved in with me and then the coronavirus pandemic hit and our romance took a nosedive. I just dont know if Im asking for too much or if hes just making up excuses. Our plan for celebrating our anniversary like its nothing? everything stopped. He only got me a childrens bear . I met this guy 6months ago we were happy and everything was going well, until last week Friday.He went out with his friends and he came back in the morning. I think the common thread here is, we are attaching ourselves to emotionally unavailable men. Please help me , I have the same situation weve been dating for a year and 3 months and its the exact same way idky doe . I was dipping into my bucket to bring him up but I wasnt getting anything in return. You deserve to be treated well and loved the way you want to be loved. This guy is not considerate at all and does not have your best interest at heart. (he was asked from her what are u doing, when she replied studying, he texted shall i come to study with u, and she replied there are my friends at my room, and he replied its k.no matter i ll come) But anyway after i saw it i lost my trust on him. months later of constant chats and calls he then confessed that he still love me and he was sorry for what happened in the past. Date. Everyone always says how Couples always fight, but that was never us. I used to love doing that! Ill call him daily or send him texts but he only leaves me on seen and doesnt reply. Hes just happy having me in his life because Im supportive and loving but I dont see much effort on his side except when he really wants to do things he really likes. He has recently been stressed about getting into grad school and got denied for his first two school. Its time to let him go, you did all you could. Its like Im wrapped around his finger but he doesnt want to care and so its hard for me to let go because I truly love him but hes not the same with me. No boyfriend in the world can fill the emptiness that only God can fill. I always drive to his and he never makes an effort to go to me. Unlike me, hes understanding and loyal (my family loves him) but his situation is really difficult but im getting tired of being the only one that tries to make this work by always initiating stuff. We are ok, but I still do everything, I cook everything, he never cooks for me, I clean, washing, I get the shopping, he wont even take the bins out when I ask, because of my approach apparently. But I clearly have seen enough examples of the ones who simply stops caring when they are sure that we will be theirs and we will always care about them no matter what. Recently, despite being together for 5 years, I feel like a booty call. We do get a long very well and we are highly mature people. This isnt a man. I am not allowed upstairs in their house either, it just makes me feel uncomfortable if I go to his. He has always been so sweet and consistent. But it hasnt. But he was not my husband and my family didnt approve of such activities before marriage. but yeah I rlly love this guy and our relationship is dying. But he still makes no effort in even recognizing relationship milestones like anniversaries, but he has done romantic things for the girl he chased for 6 years. Ive asked him to work on this and as the article says, he says he will and he does..for about a half a day. Because you are a happy individual yourself, he would feel lucky to share his life with you. i jst think hes all abt himself and idk wht do. I am really sad about it, because I know we love each other, but this relationship as it is doesnt satisfy me. Hi, Your post really reflects on me. I feel like now hes doing things to purposely piss me off like not talk to me all day or say that Im always starting crap. Your email address will not be published. We had romantic dates and fell in love at first sight. A Relationship Expert Explains, How to Recognize Signs of Passive-Aggressive Behavior in Your Spouse, Chemistry Between People Depends on These 7 Traits, Signs and Causes of Emotional Neglect in a Marriage and How to Cope, 8 Signs of an Emotionally Unavailable Partner, 16 Signs of Falling in Love That Mean It's Real, How to Stop Being Needy in a Relationship, How to Stop Overthinking Your Relationship, 10 Signs of an Emotionally-Abusive Relationship, How to Ask for a Father's Permission to Marry His Daughter. My boyfriend and me zoomed and emailed and he moved from job to job. I realized he was not the man for me. Then we usually get in an argument and sometimes we break off for about a week. Yet around the holidays, he has completely dropped off the radar and is barely giving me more than a one word text response back. You cant change how he acts toward youyou can only change your expectations. We were together for three years. One of the issues I have had for almost 2 years is that he does not put effort to see me. I dont deserve this. I even dressed like a naughty teacher when we had sex. You will be happy, trust me. I have tried these and it really made me respect and love myself way more than I used to do over past. I was told by my therapist that I could be the one to plan the date myself and ask him out and even though I completely agree with her on that, I cant help feel now that if I were to do that and ask him on a date that he will think that he doesnt ever have to put in the effort of planning something, anything, and that if he waits long enough I will plan it for us so he doesnt have to. He apologized but I was just so hurt. He just doesnt make an effort to ask me to do things. Its really hard, but Im trying. You are strong. Nothing. Also be prepared to lose him. He has motivation and spends money on doing that but what about me lol, he puts no effort into our relationship. And I hardly have any money since I am paying for literally everything. If you almost never see each other, then sitting down to talk about your relationship or his lack of effort would look much different than if you live together. I am not an emotionally stable person I take meds for anxiety and depression and have for years now. This weekend I went to my sisters house and watched a ball game and the next day went to a movie with a friend. This past week, I got strep throat and was miserable, so I didnt do anything, and since I got antibiotics, Ive been feeling better, but Im debating on doing anything to show him how much I do and how little he does. Again, tons of excuses. His mom, so sweet and caring, once scolded me because I refused to go on a trip with him. Now he wont go anywhere with me he wont touch me in front of anyone we dont do anything and he refuses to do anything fun the only thing we do is work he dont go to the kids is events or anything but it is X need something hell drop everything And do it. he said hell give me more time but nothing ever changes. My boyfriend and I have been dating for three months. Ive been with my boyfriend for 2 years and recently he has started to change. but he never ever ever takes any pictures of me to show me off. What you talk about really does depend on the issues youre facing, how long youve been together, and why your boyfriend isnt making an effort in your relationship. We have so much in common, yet not at the same time. It was all too perfect in the beginning and I was fearful. I dont know what to do. He has joint custody of his 17 yr old daughter and about 2 months ago he found out that her stepdad had been engaging in sexual activity with her. 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